As the the years passed, I began to yearn for human contact. The safest way I could possibly achieve that and begin to come out of my shell was through the YouTube community. I began following YouTubers-not the uber popular/all for commercial value ones, but the everyday people who talked about everyday things. At first my vlogs and videos were like any newbie's on YT. I was shy, quiet and unsure what to talk about. But as I began to develope friendships with other YouTubers, my shell slowly started to fall away and I was unafraid to try new things-atleast in the YouTube world I was anyway.
In person, I have always been bold & outspoken, but I was always a little shy around strangers. After a few months of vlogging, I was able to speak up more in my videos.
What amazed me (and still amazes me) is the lack of human kindness and compassion among some people in the YT community. It seems so easy for strangers to prowl amongst the vlogs and videos on YT and brazeningly leave demeaning, damning and just plain hateful remarks. I can't fully understand the need to tear another human-being apart who has done one no harm at all.
It's a form a victimization all over again. When we were burglarized, the men were very demeaning and cruel to my husband, my children and myself. The only difference with these cyber bullies, is that I've been there and done that and this time I ain't taking it no more !! I won't let them make me feel as though I don't belong or I need to hide from the world. My family and I have survived much worse than a handful of cruel words.
Yet, I come here to write about this issue because I want to understand the nature of the people who are so cruel. I want to know what's happened to them to make them behave like rabid animals.
Some of the comments I've received or witnessed on YouTube videos include :
- "your a fat ugly bitch why dont u just kill urself"
- "disgusting..u shuld just die"
- "ur kids r reterded just like there mom"
- "looks disgusting u fat caw. grosse"
I am always curious who the person is leaving me or one of my fellow YouTubers, so I check the channel linked to the comments. 99.9% of the time, the troublemakers don't even make videos and are under 18 years old. Some I have seen as young as 13 years old. Which makes me wonder, where is this kid's parents and why isn't someone monitoring their internet usage ?
Even more disturbing is to find out it is an adult doing these things. I can almost sympathize with an angry kid doing mean and hateful things. I think, maybe their home life is a mess and they need an outlet. Maybe, other kids pick on them at school. But when I adult does it, you wonder, is this person demented ? A serial killer, maybe ? An abuser themself ? What could possibly justify being so dirty and cruel to another human being ?
These hateful people on YT would probably never be so bold in "the real world". I'm quite sure they would never have the nads to walk up to me on the street and call me fat and disgusting or tell me I should commit suicide. So, what makes them do these mean things online ? Are they sick ? Should they be urged to seek help ? The words don't offend me as they probably hope they will. What does happen when I see this kind of behavior is I become angered my their cruelty. Then I begin to feel pity for them. I want to see deeper into their life and know what is hurting them so badly that they would lash out in such a way.
Have we become so numb by what we see on TV shows and in the news that it is now considered okay to mistreat anyone and everyone ? Has the anonymity of the internet allowed us become inhuman towards one another ? If so, then where will this technological generation be when they are adults with children of their own ?